prickly_muffins' life stories!!!

an ever-expanding selection of silly stories. for legal reasons, all of these are 100% fictional.

greening out in middle school

This story takes place in the winter of 7th grade, I'm pretty sure the exact date was December 3rd. I had smoked weed a few times before this point and every time it was a nice experience, but notably, it was always at my friend's house with company. This was my first time on edibles. Also an important piece of information--I have always been a very small dude and a huge lightweight, which is why every decision I made at the start of this ordeal was incredibly reckless.

I was sitting in the courtyard eating lunch, and my friend Kelly (all names are changed!) came up to me with this huge grin on her face and said she had something for me. Kelly was a grade older than me and knew I'd smoked before, and we weren't very close so this was a surprise. She pulled out a plastic bottle of Trulieve edibles and said that her friend gave it to her but she was too scared to take them, and offered me the whole thing for free. So obviously, like any sensible person, I thought "Hell yeah, free drugs!!!" and took the offer.

A big part of the reason why this day was a disaster was this one problem: there was no indication of how much thc was in the edibles. I actually still don't know how much I took that day. There was nothing written on the bottle about it, and I guess I didn't think to ask Kelly but I don't think she knew either. In hindsight, that might've been the reason she was scared to take them.

After Kelly left and gave me the edibles, one of my best friends--Lindsey--joined me for lunch. She was and still is very much a stoner (I'm still best friends with her and the other person that'll be introduced shortly!) and smoked a lot more than me and her tolerance was wayyy higher. Lindsey was super excited for me and my free weed, and because sharing is caring, I gave her two of the gummies. Mind you, these gummies were the size of quarters and about a centimeter and a half thick, so we could've easily split them in half or even in fourths to be safe, but we did not because we were idiot kids. Our conclusion was basically "well, we're probably supposed to take one whole one..." so we each took one edible. I found out later that Lindsey gave the other edible I gave her to my other best friend Frank. He'd smoked as much as I had at this point and also had never taken edibles, but he's taller than I am and for some reason his tolerance is a lot higher. More on my friends perspectives later.

My next class after lunch was P.E. You'd think this would be the perfect class to be high in, but nooo it was December which means end of semester testing. I still thought I was pretty much home free, though, because the test was supposed to be easy and it wouldn't really matter if I failed anyway. Towards the middle of the test, around 40 minutes had passed since I'd eaten the gummy and I was starting to get skeptical about how strong it was. Silly me.

When I tell you it was exactly like the meme that's like man, this edible ain't shi- 0.0 oh my god. My vision started to get a bit fuzzy and I quickly realized I was high. At first, I was excited because this was supposed to be a new and fun experience, but within a matter of 5 minutes it progressed and I realized I was way too high. The first thing I noticed was how weird everything looked--everything I saw was fuzzy and had this weird afterglow to it. My hearing was also messed up because of all the blood going to my head, all i could hear was the rush of blood and periodically all the noise around me got muffled and my ears rang. I straight up thought I was going to die.

So I was fully panicking at this point but still at least trying to stay calm, and oh yeah I'm still taking the P.E. test. I rushed through all the questions to turn it in so that I could go on my phone and google whether or not I was going to die.

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